Even though relationships with age gaps are always provoking some remarks and judgment, it is becoming more and more socially acceptable to see a man dating an older woman these days. More and more men are now openly dating what we call “cougars,” and a lot of great relationships are being born every day no matter what the age gap is. Whether it is for serious relationships or casual hookups, a lot of men are attracted to older women. But not everybody can answer the following questions: what is it like to date a cougar? How to seduce a cougar? How should the date with a cougar look like?
Actually, when we say cougar, we are referring to an older woman who is attracted to younger men. It does not only describe a woman who is “of a certain age,” but it also means that the woman is interested in the younger men, ready to make advances to them and start flirting with them. In general, cougars are then at least 30 years old or older. And they are considered as cougars when they are interested in men who are at least eight years younger than them. So for instance, a woman who is 40 years old and wants to date someone who is 32 years old or younger can be defined as a cougar. The typical stereotype of a cougar is an unmarried woman between the ages of 35 and 55 maintaining a youthful and attractive physical appearance either by exercising a lot, by using cosmetics or by doing cosmetic surgeries. They are relatively wealthy, or at least financially independent, and they are not afraid to show their sexual preferences by publicly flirting with younger men and seeking casual relationships or sexual encounters with them. Of course, this is only a stereotype because there are also cougars who are seeking younger men they can have serious relationships with and eventually get married!
First of all, you have to be careful not to go too fast and to show your interest too quickly. Most of the cougars are not seeking serious relationships and just want to have fun, so you must be the “hard to get young man” that they will chase. Thus, you will have to have the perfect balance between showing your interest and also letting her now that you are not easy to get. So compliment her and express your desire (because cougars are in need of attention and compliments) but don’t act as if she had completely “won” you from the first second because there will be no tension and excitement anymore for her. At first, act like you are interested, but you want to know more about her to be sure that she is “good enough for you.” Secondly, since you are not dealing with teenagers but with experienced women, you have to be able to demonstrate your intelligence and culture. Indeed, there are few chances that a cougar will want to talk about meaningless and shallow subjects. They want to have profound, interesting, and smart conversations with inspiring people, so don’t be afraid to talk about any “serious” or “deep” subject you like. And also, try to show that you have a little bit of culture or that you are at least interested in learning more about literature, arts and so on. Improving your vocabulary, your knowledge, and the way you express yourself can also help a lot. But the best way to show your intelligence is to use your sense of humor during the conversations! So if you think of anything funny or witty to say, don’t hesitate to share it. Actually, any playful behavior is welcome. Even though you don’t want to look silly and exaggerate the playfulness of your interactions, being playful is always a good thing because cougars are looking for men who will amuse them, have a young mindset and stand out from all the men of her age that she considers too boring. So don’t be afraid to also show your young, childish and innocent side and to play with her, to tease her like you would tease one of your friends. Now, if you feel that she is interested in you, don’t wait too long before taking action and ask her out on a date. When you invite her on a date, be confident. Nobody wants to have to deal with someone who is constantly hesitating, who does not know what he wants and who has self-confidence issues, so ask her in a straightforward way without being ashamed and act like if you already knew that the answer would be “yes” anyway.
When you ask a cougar on a date, you should know exactly what you are going to propose to her. Indeed, they expect you to decide where you will go, when, at what time and so on. She does not want to be forced to decide where you will meet, so it is up to you to find great ideas of places to go. Also, it is simply a characteristic of an “alpha” male to be able to take the leadership, to take initiatives, and to organize everything so that it happens smoothly. Choose a classy place since they are used to a higher lifestyle than younger women are, and try to know enough about her interest in order to choose a place that she will like.
So to conclude, if you are interested in dating a cougar, try to see it as a game that both of you will enjoy and try to make it look as if she has to chase you. Don’t be afraid to compliment her and to show your interest, but don’t put all your cards on the table right from the start! Be playful, funny, amusing, and show your intelligence in order to impress her. At the end of the day, if you are attracted to her and if you are able to express your interest in a subtle and smart way, you will see that seducing her is not that hard at all!